The Christian life - The Chr..

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com. That's cornerstonerbc.com. Well, brothers and sisters, we come once again to our studies, as we have been for many weeks now, in the context of the Christian life. No longer in the individual life, now we have started the Christian life in the context of the biblical family, the context of the biblical family.

And if you remember last week, I spoke about what the biblical family is, or even what a family is and the essential nature of a family in the community or in the society. Because I said back then families are the very bedrock, the foundation of society. If you have unhealthy families, then you're going to have unhealthy societies. It's just as simple as that. And God is the one who has ordained the structure of the family.

He's ordained the key members of the family and what their roles and responsibilities will be in the context of that family under God. And I said last week, as a reminder, what is a family? What is the essence of a family? How is it rooted? How is it founded?

And we know that according to scripture, family begins, it is rooted in when a man leaves his father and mother's home and cleaves to his wife. That is one man with one woman, and they enter into what is called a covenant relationship, a marriage whereby the two become one flesh under God and that constitutes the beginning of a family. Now, of course, the Lord may bless that marriage with children and that those children then come into the already established family. They may adopt as well. Those adopted children will come into that already established family because that family is established in the husband and in the wife who've entered into that that covenant relationship and this is where things get messy in the world.

Our society has put the family as God has ordained it under assault. We know this. The word of God is under direct assault by our society, by what the world espouses and what they're throwing into the mix is a mass confusion. We spoke about that last week, so I don't need to go into any great detail this week on that matter. But that means that the assault from the world is going to attack the family from every which direction.

It could be from the husband. What is even a male and what is a female? We know that that's even under attack because that's now fluid, apparently, according to the world. When in Christ's word, it is one male or a female and there's only two genders, not 50 or 101 or whatever they've got to now. I'm not too sure.

But now the family is under attack, so the husband is under attack, and the role and responsibility of a wife within the context of the family, within the context of a marriage, is under attack. So what we see in this world is, as I said earlier, mass confusion. Beloved, it is essential. It is essential that we know with a great deal of clarity and certainty what our role under God in the context of the Christian family is. This is how we honor him.

This is how we build healthy families under God. Families that would honor him and love him and serve him. Families that will bring honor to Jesus Christ our Lord. and our Savior. Last week I spoke to the husband, the responsibility of the husband, and I said that the responsibility of the husband, it was quite narrow in the context of a biblical marriage, was to love his wife like Christ loved the church.

And a manifestation of that love was to sanctify her, was to bring the Word of God to bear upon that relationship, upon the family and the children, to bring the Word of God to bear upon his household. And through it, as Christ sanctifies his church through his word, the husband sanctifies his wife through the washing through the word. And that's a great responsibility, husbands. Man, it's a great responsibility that is placed on us, and it's not a responsibility we ought to take lightly. So this week, the tables have turned a little, and now we'll be concentrating our efforts on what the Bible says, in particular, to the sisters among us, in particular, more narrowly, to the wives among us, or those sisters who one day will be wives in the context of a biblical marriage.

And beloved, what I'm about to say this evening is going to be grounded, I believe, in Scripture, and it will be met with great opposition from the world. When we speak about the role and responsibility of a wife in the context of a biblical marriage, this is a great offense to the way the world thinks. As they say, the fruit is in the pudding. Isn't that what they say? I think I've killed that.

The proof is in the pudding. That's how they say it. I'm not one for sayings. What does the world espouse? What are they pushing for?

What are they saying should be the construction of what is called a marriage or even the deconstruction of a marriage? Where the proof is in the pudding. Look at what the world espouses and look at the fruit of what they're espousing. How are families, what is the health of the families in our societies today? What is the health of the marriages that we see all around us today?

There's dysfunction, there's confusion, There's rebellion of children in marriages at all time high. They're breaking down everywhere because of sin and because of a departure from what God has ordained for his creatures. He's the creator God who has ordained what is for the very best of his creatures. And when we reject and we turn away from God, then what are we left with? We're left with espousing and endorsing what is of our own opinion.

And beloved, that is mayhem. That is what we see in the world today. And I said last week, we would be absolutely mad. out of our minds if we appeal to the world and we look to the world to establish and to receive answers of how we ought to live in the context of a family, in the context of a marriage. So this week, by God's grace, let's open our Bibles to Ephesians chapter five.

You can go there. We're not going to immediately read the text. But Ephesians chapter five, we were there last week. We began from verse 25 last week. This week we'll be starting our reading from verse 22, which is a topic, which has the topic of wives as the focal point.

But before we begin our reading, before we begin to speak specifically about the role and responsibility of a wife, a biblical wife, in the context of a biblical marriage, I want to reiterate something that I said last week. And this is very, very, very important. It's very important that we don't just go to Scripture and pull some verses out and just deal with those verses out of context, and then say that we know of the topic, that we've done the study on the topic. It's not maybe necessary for us to appeal to the whole Bible every time we're looking to a topic, although that would be fruitful. But when we appeal to any passage or set a series of verses or a paragraph, we must remember, as I said last week, that that paragraph, that passage, those few verses, that verse, that saying, that phrase is given to us by God in the context of that chapter, in the context of that book.

And I said last week, When the book of the epistles were given to the church in the first century, they were read in their totality. That means that Ephesians chapter 5 comes as a book of six chapters. Now, the chapter breaks are something that had been added through history, maybe a thousand years later. And the verse says, I mean, it's good for us because we can reference and go there. But in those days, it was just one letter and it was read in its totality to the churches.

So the beloved, the believers who received this letter, received it from the right of the apostle Paul, knowing that he was under inspiration as the apostle of Christ, and then received it as the word of God in the context that it was given. And I said last week, that is like calling, like building a foundation. What comes before chapter five is the foundation to understanding chapter five. And we elaborated on that last week, so no need to do that this week. But beloved, There is something that is of chief importance.

Something that I said in relation to the husbands before we even begin of how they should be relating to their wives, something that they have to have as the chief importance, the most important thing in their hearts and in their minds in relation to how they conduct themselves with the relationships God has given them, and in particular with their relationship to their wife. And if you remember, I said that according to the first few chapters of Ephesians, It teaches us that before the husband has the ability to relate to anyone, he must first and foremost be of most important in his heart is his relationship with the Lord, right? That his most important desire of his heart is to be in a healthy relationship with Jesus Christ. That is the foundation. That is the relationship of all relationships.

He's not able to, He's not able to have a relationship with others or to deal with others in a biblical manner, in a way that honors Christ, unless he is right with the Lord Jesus Christ, unless his heart is in the right place, unless he's taken the teachings of the Lord to heart and he's submitted to them and he's living his life in faith, in faith to the Lord Jesus Christ. I said that was foundational, not only to the husband, but to the wife as well. That the first relationship that should be of the utmost importance in your life is not your husband, and husband's not your wife. The first relationship that should be of utmost importance is the relationship you have with God in Christ Jesus. All the other relationships flow from that one relationship.

I said that was foundational and it is, but there's actually something even more foundational. Something that I want to talk about this evening before we begin to speak about the relationship of a wife or her role with her husband, beloved, I think it's prudent for us to go there this evening because the passage that we're going to be discussing is quite controversial, not only in the world, but even within the so-called professing Christian church. So what it boils down to is this. Before I move on, I want to ask a series of two questions. Brothers and sisters, these are foundational questions.

If we don't answer yes to both, We can't move on. If we don't answer yes to both of these questions, then it doesn't matter how much we read of this book. It doesn't matter how much we meditate upon it. It doesn't matter. Everything falls apart.

Beloved, it is critically important that we answer yes to these two questions, not only in our minds, but in our hearts. And these are the questions I want to ask. First, Do you believe that our God is a God who speaks? And the second question is this. Do you believe that this God, the God who speaks, has spoken fully and finally in his word, the incarnate word, Jesus Christ, and in his written word that he's given us, which we call the Bible.

Is this the word of God? Not that it contains the word of God. Is this book the word of God from Genesis chapter one to Revelation chapter 22? Do we believe God is a God who speaks? And do we believe that he has spoken fully and finally, and he's revealed all he wishes to reveal in his word that he's given us in his written word, the Bible?

Because essentially, that's what it all comes down to. Now realize I didn't ask, do you believe that there is a God? And do you believe if there is a God, do you believe he should be obeyed? Because there are many people in our world who do believe there is a God. And they also believe that if there is a God or since there is a God, he should be obeyed, he must be obeyed.

He's the creature, he's the authoritative, sorry, the creator. He's the authoritative one over his creatures. So it is logical that if there is a God, then he should be obeyed. But this is the problem. The problem is they don't recognize that this is the word of God.

They don't recognize that God spoke and he speaks and he speaks through this word. Some will say that he's spoken and his word is contained in the Bible. In other words, that can go through and they can pick and choose. Beloved, you know where that leaves us? You know that where that leaves humanity?

It leaves them absolutely confused on all issues of life. Even if you do believe that there is a God, if you don't recognize that this is his word, he is spoken in this book, the truths that are found in this book are as authoritative as if God is speaking them even now to us. Then what you're left with is appealing to the faculties that you have access to. And every faculty in a human being, we're told by the authority of scripture, is fallen. Every last bit, it's defiled.

What are they left with? They're left with a corrupted intellect, a defiled emotions, and polluted wills. And if that's all you're appealing to, you can imagine why we come across so much confusion. The transcendent God. cannot be known unless he chooses to make himself known.

And then he reveals himself in a way that his preachers can know him and understand what he says. That's a tremendous grace. So I'll pose the question once again. Do you believe that God is a God who speaks? And do you believe that he has spoken fully and finally in this book?

that we call the Bible. See, we can't move on unless we answer yes to both those questions, because beloved, there are serious consequences that follow our answers. Let's face it, you and I, we've never seen God. You and I, we've never audibly heard his voice. You and I have never seen with these eyes the incarnate son of God who came into this world We haven't seen this Jesus Christ who roamed the streets of first century Palestine and taught with incredible wisdom the multitudes.

We haven't seen Jesus Christ and the multiple miracles that he did amongst or before thousands and thousands of people. We weren't there when he willingly laid down his life. as a substitutionary sacrifice upon the cross there in Jerusalem. We didn't see with our own eyes the precious blood that was shed upon that cross. Beloved, we did not see them pull his lifeless body off that tree and place him in a tomb.

Nor were we there on the third day when that tomb was indeed empty. We didn't see the risen Savior in glory as Thomas did, where he said, Thomas, touch my hands and touch my feet. My nail-pierced hands and my nail-pierced feet. And we did not see the risen Savior ascend into heaven as the disciples did there in Bethany to see him sit at the right hand of the Father until he returns to take us home. We did not see any of these things.

But here we are in this place, and we're called Christians, followers of this Jesus that we have never seen with our eyes, and we've never audibly heard with our ears. I ask you, why? Why? We've already established it wasn't because of a physical encounter, was it? But beloved, we have had, by the grace of God, a spiritual encounter with the risen saviour.

An encounter with Jesus Christ through the knowledge of him that has been given to us through his word. We don't know these things apart from what's written in his book. That's it. We are here this evening because we believe what is written in this book. Beloved, that is so foundational.

The Spirit of God has made known the Word of God and has made it alive in our souls. And we are here because we believe this book. All of it. You know, pick and choose. All of it is the Word of God.

And we believe what it claims to be. It self-attests to be the Word of God. It self-attests to be of divine origin from beginning and to end. And we're here because we have faith in the risen savior and we have come to know him through what is written in this book, as we know is the word of God. So when we come across passages like 2 Timothy 3, 16, that on no less than maybe 20 occasions, we've referred to through Bible studies and our sermons, where it reads, all scripture is breathed out by God.

All scripture is breathed out by God. All scripture is breathed out by God. And it is profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, for training in righteousness, that the man of God may be completely equipped in every good work. We believe, we believe it is the word of God, that's it. And if this is the word of God, it contains or it carries with it the supreme authority of God.

And that type of faith in this word, as I said earlier, has consequences. One that compels us Christians not only to believe, but also to obey. also today. Because it's one thing to say that you have not yet come to an understanding. It's one thing to say, I believe this is God's Word, but I yet have not come to an understanding of a particular doctrine or a particular teaching.

That's one thing. But to come to understand what this book says, and then to say, I'm not going to obey the love of King, we see what we're doing. That's not just opposition to what is written in a book. That is opposition to the very authority of God. That is an opposition to God himself.

So when we acknowledge that our God is a God who speaks and our God is a God who has revealed himself fully and finally in this word, then what we find in the pages of scripture, we take to be authoritative as though God is speaking to them even now. And beloved, that means that we sit back, We believe if the Spirit of God has placed that trust and that faith in our hearts, and that we appeal to the Lord through the Spirit to empower us, not only to believe, but to stand and obey, even if the whole world opposes, even if the whole world says we are foolish, that we stand and that we obey. This is so absolutely foundational. because this book not only leads us to Christ for our salvation, this book also teaches us of how we ought to live as the body of Christ, as those who have been united in Jesus Christ. Beloved, this book is so foundational and that always in the essence of our hearts, absolutely always.

Because God has opened our eyes to see truth. The confusion that is in the world is no longer in us, because we've been removed, spiritually speaking, from the world. Not because we're more smart or we're more intelligent or we figured it out on our own. No, it's because the Spirit of God has supernaturally taken us out of the realm of darkness where there's confusion and lies and deception. And he's brought us into the light, the kingdom of the sun, so that we can see things for what they are, that we can understand God's word for what it is.

And now there is no need to be confused. We can be clear because the word of God has revealed to our soul. It's a beautiful thing to believe the word of God, but it's something that has to happen by the direct power of God. So as believers, we might wrestle with some of the meaning of the text. We can do that together as iron sharpens iron.

But when the Lord reveals a truth, our only or the only response of a Christian, there ought not to be any conflict in his spirit. The only response of the Christian is, Lord, reveal your will and then empower me to obey. obey your will. The teaching of scripture is clear. God is a God of love.

The teaching of scripture is clear. He loves us and everything he commands is for our own good. Do we believe that also? Everything that he commands is for our own good. And it is a real basic.

I'm not expecting that any of you would say, this is a breakthrough. It's the first time. I'm hoping you've heard this a hundred times, but I hope it never gets dull to your ear as a mind. Like as I prepare, this is so, this is like fire that's been flamed in my heart. These are foundational truths that we just know we can regurgitate every day possibly.

But beloved brothers and sisters, just reminding ourselves of these things, it's just so glorious that God only deals with his people. for good. The only instruction, the only command, the only precept that is given to his people is always for their good. And this is not only a New Testament teaching, it is always been the heart of God. You may have missed it or you may have got it.

But do you remember in the corporate reading on the Lord's Day, the one that just passed, we had Deuteronomy chapter 10. And I read it and I gave some brief explanation on bits and pieces. You couldn't go through the light to it. It's a very heavy chapter, but I hope you got it because this truth was actually found in that chapter. Let me just read one or two verses for you from Deuteronomy chapter 10 and show you how even back then, the people of God were made aware that everything God commands is absolutely for their own good.

It's found in Deuteronomy chapter 10, and I'm gonna read from verse 13. It's quickly becoming apparent that I'm not going to get through everything I wanted to say. So I'll try to either speak very quickly or I'll try to summarize. Deuteronomy chapter 10 verse 13. You remember the context, I hope.

And now Moses speaking to the people of Israel. And now Israel, what does the Lord your God require of you? You remember, I said the five part answer of what the people of Israel ought to do. The first thing, fear the Lord your God, to walk in his ways, to love him, to serve the Lord your God with all your heart and all your soul. Here it is, verse 13.

Sorry, we start from verse 12. My apologies. Verse 13, and to keep, and to keep the commandments and statutes of the Lord, which I am commanding you today for what? For your good. For your good.

Oh, how simple it would be for a Christian to sit back and think, God, why have you commanded us so many things? Why is your word so heavy? Why is your commandment so difficult? May we always see that as Christ says, his burden is light, his yoke is easy and his burden is light, that all that God has commanded of his people is indeed for our own good. And brothers and sisters, I need to ask you, do you really believe this?

Is this the conviction of your heart that everything that we find in scripture, no matter how difficult the doctrine is, is indeed for our own good. Because this is foundational, not only for the way husbands are to lay down their lives in love for their wives, but this is also foundational when we come to the topic of wives and how their role and responsibility and how their actions ought to be in the context of a biblical marriage. It's taken me a long time to build that foundation, but I felt that it was necessary that before I begin to give the instruction that the scripture says about how wives ought to conduct themselves, that we recognize those truths, that in your heart, I don't want to hear it out loud, in your heart, that you've answered those questions, and I hope you answered them in the affirmative. that I do believe. I do believe our God is a God who speaks.

I do believe he's given us his word fully and finally in this way, it is all his word. And I believe that everything he's instructed his people is for their own good. And I believe because he has been revealed to me by faith in Jesus Christ, who has redeemed me and saved me from my sin, taken me from the confusion of that darkness and brought me into the clarity of the light to see truth for what it is. So now sisters in particular wives, and those who one day will become wives, what does our loving Lord, whose instruction is only for your own good, what does he, through his word, instruct in relation to your role and your responsibility to your husbands? What is his instruction for you, wives, sisters, for the context of a biblical marriage?

How that plays out with your role in the broader context of the family, that is your children and beyond, we will look at next week, by God's grace. That'll be the topic of next week, children and the biblical family. But tonight, as I said earlier, I wanna narrow down. Beloved, it's very difficult when we're approaching topics like this. And I struggled immensely last week and this week, to be honest, because we're talking about topics that we can do 10, 12, 15 week series on.

and we're going, okay, let's teach this in a week. So, either we jump really quickly from one topic to another or we look at things a little bit more clearly and we go a little bit more narrowly. It's a difficult decision that needs to be made. So, today I want to say we're going to leave much on the table, much on the table. But what we will go through, what we will consider, I hope the Lord will impact our hearts.

Because the truth is glorious and it is always, always for our own good. So as I said, last week we began in chapter five, so I just wanted to go back there. So both weeks are linked in some way. We read from 22 last week, but we only considered verses 25 and onwards. This week we'll look at verses 22 through 24, and that's where our attention will be given.

We'll park there this evening with the moments that we have left. So what did we read from verse 22? Wives, submit to your own husbands as to the Lord, for the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, his body, sorry, and in him, in himself, it's savior. Now, as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands. Wives, submit to your own Husbands, do you see why?

Do you see why I want to start with a foundational truth that this book is the word of God? Because beloved, if you could pick and choose, This I'll keep, this I won't keep. Like the Jesus Seminar, they color code the portions of the New Testament that they think are truly inspired and those that don't think they're inspired. That is heresy. If we could pick and choose, our society will impact us and they'll put so much pressure to pick this verse or this teaching is not eternal.

It's not internal truth from the Lord. Why? Because it is so offensive. It is so offensive to the flesh. How offensive are these words that wives should submit to their husbands in everything?

How offensive is that to the world and the way the world believes? How demeaning is the Bible is what they're saying? Women are no less capable than men is what they'll cry out. I agree with that. We're not in a disagreement there.

They'll continue and they'll say, in many marriages, women are even more intelligent than their husband. I don't disagree with that either. But then they'll say, it's beneath a woman to submit to her husband. That's archaic. The Bible is archaic.

It's speaking about a different culture. It's speaking about a different time. It's old fashioned. That was back then, this is now. Women were oppressed in those days, they would say.

They weren't given value in those days, they would say. That's a different time, a different epoch in history. But the modern world, those words are just unacceptable. We won't take it. That's the declaration of the world.

Pushing women's rights, pushing what they would call equity, pushing no gender roles, pushing in their own minds to liberate women. They would say the humble housewife needs to be liberated from that prison. Does that sound common to your ears? They have no understanding. No understanding as we've already established that every command, every word of our Lord is for the ultimate good of his people.

He's designed what is for the very best for humanity. Beloved, I said what I said before about the Word of God and recognizing that in the heart, not just in the mind, in the heart. Because if you don't believe that this is God's Word in its totality and carries with it the absolute authority of God, that it would be the only reason why you would not jump on the bandwagon of the world and give away doctrines like what we have here before us. Because we trust it is his word and we trust that he has given us his word and everything he has instructed is indeed for our own good. That is the foundation.

We need to keep reminding our hearts of that truth. Now let's get one thing straight. And this is a deception that the world tries to push because of their lack of understanding about this truth. Godly submission of a wife to her husband, uniquely her own husband, it's not every husband, we see that, to her own husband, it says here in our English. Godly submission to her own husband has absolutely nothing to do with her value or her worth or her dignity.

Nothing. The world will pile that in there and say, she's of less value and of less dignity, of less worth. But that is a lie that is deception. The scripture is clear that the value of both men and women is exactly the same. No distinction, no distinction in value and worth in the eyes of God, zero.

Let's make that clear from the beginning. Let's call a lie for what it is. There is no value distinction between a man, a male and a female, a husband and a wife in the eyes of God. Back in the creation account, we see this. It says, so God created man in his own image.

In the image of God, he created him. Male and female, he created them. Both Adam and Eve were created in the image of God. There has been questioned about that passage. Many have said, because of what is written in the literal English, that would say, hold on, only man was created in the image of God.

Because it says here, God created man in his own image. In the image of God, he created him, right? It sounds like only man has been created in the image of God. But beloved, so many times through scripture, that word man is adam, and it speaks about humanity. It encompasses Humanity.

Actually, to prove this, in Genesis chapter five, this is Genesis chapter one, verse 27, by the way. In Genesis chapter five and in second verse, listen to how the Holy Spirit clarifies things for us. He writes, male and female, he created them, and he blessed them, so created them, plural, and he blessed them, plural, and named them, plural, man, singular. When they were created. Male and female, he created them, he blessed them, and he named them man, singular.

That word man, Adam, is a representation of all humanity. Both men and women were created in the image of, that is, Adam and Eve were created in the image of God. Beloved, Adam and Eve were in the image of God perfectly. This is before the fall, right? The self-worth was on equal footing However, man was created first.

We're told that. And the woman was created, he says, from man to be the help meat for man. She would be under his authority and she would be her husband's helper. He will lead and she will follow. That's the design of God for the wife.

There's a functional difference here, not one of value. It's a functional difference of difference between role and responsibility between the wife and the husband, but it's not one of worth. Let's just get that clear automatically. It's not one of the lie. The world will try to espouse and deceive people into to throw away this book.

And it's truth is to say that women oppressed in this way. No, there are examples in the word where sinful men oppressed women, and we don't hide that the Bible speaks truthfully. It reveals that that wasn't God's design. Hopefully we'll see that by the end of this evening. Even in the New Testament, we see this teaching so clearly, can't we?

Can you think of some passages in your mind? You don't have to say them out loud. Can you think of any passages in your mind that will show us the equality that we have in Jesus Christ, in the new covenant? Think about Galatians 3, 28. There is neither Jew nor Greek.

There is neither slave nor free. There is no male and female, for you are one in Christ Jesus. Beloved, He's not speaking about roles here. He's not speaking about the role and the function and the responsibility of it. He's talking about, in Christ, this equality, your value, your worth.

Beloved, it is the same price that Jesus paid. It is the precious blood of Jesus Christ that paid for both. It was the same purchase price. because they are the same value in God's eyes. The same apostle says in 1 Corinthians 11, nor man of woman, for as woman was made from man, so man is now born of woman.

All things are from God." He's saying, don't you, for a moment, think, better what I've been teaching until now, this 1 Corinthians 11, also a controversial passage. Don't think for a moment that I'm saying men are up here and women are down here. Before the Lord, they are all from God. They are of equal value.

You're independent of one another. You need one another. Your relationship is one of complementariness. relationship. And we have to take that on board.

There is a difference in authority. There is a difference in position of leadership. But Christ himself, beloved, Christ himself submitted to the will of the Father in the incarnation. Does that make him less of worth? the father?

Does the son, the incited son of God, does that make him less value, less of worth? Okay, so now scripture is clear. It's not a matter of value, but there's something greater. There's something more profound in the roles of the husband and the wife, that relationship, that most sacred relationship that we know on the earth. There's nothing more intimate, there's nothing more sacred than the relationship between a husband and a wife, because the Bible speaks of no other physical relationship where the two become one flesh.

So beloved, there's something that is far more profound is the picture of the marriage and what it portrays. The picture of that marriage portrays the relationship or the union that the church has with who? Christ. That one flesh relationship, that physical one flesh relationship between a husband and wife in the context of a marriage is a picture of the one spirit union of the church with Jesus Christ. And in that relationship, both the husband and the wife both do what?

Submit. You see, that's awesome, isn't it? That in the context of the marriage, there is the wife that submits to the husband, and the husband leads, and she's the helpmate. But in the context of the church and Christ, both the husband and the wife submit to Christ. Because in the context of the body of Christ, the husband and the wife are the bride of Christ.

Do you see how it's a functional difference rather than a difference in value and worth? God has made the relationship to be a type of Christ and the church and he's ordained therefore the function and the role of a husband to point to Jesus Christ. So in that relationship, so you have when Jesus says, now we know that the church consists of men and women, brothers and sisters and they both submit to Christ but when he's giving the the functional difference the role and responsibilities within the context of the marriage it's another nuance that he's giving and that nuance is in the in the context of that the wife submits to a husband we've got here in Ephesians chapter 22 the wife submits to the husband like the church submits to Christ so the picture is that that not only In reality, in essence, the church is mixed, male and female. But in this essence, when he speaks about the submissiveness, one party represents Christ and the other party represents the church. And which one's which?

The husband represents Christ and the wife represents the church. So, beloved, in the context of that marriage, As Christians who love the Lord, who are living according to His will, our marriages should bring glory and honor to our God in the beauty, because it's a reflection of the loving, intimate union that the church has with Christ. When the husband lays down his life in love for his wife, he's doing as who? As Christ. And when the wife submits to her husband, she's showing like the church ought to be submissive to her Savior.

There's a beautiful picture here of the church. Wives, submit to your own husbands. You know, there is so much that we could say about these two or three verses that are before us. and almost everything we could say he's offensive to the world. Really, almost everything.

You see, this is a blanket statement. Wives submit to your own husbands. Are there any qualifiers in that? Are there any qualifiers in that statement? Wives, submit to your own husbands.

The only qualifier is your own husband, so it's not as though wives submit to every other husband. You have a husband, singular, and you submit to him. Like Christ is the only husband, the church submits to him. But it speaks nothing of the characteristics of the wife or the husband. But I'm older than him.

Wives, submit to your husbands. But I'm wiser than him. Wives, submit to your husbands. I'm more educated than him. Wives, submit to your husbands.

I'm more responsible. I'm a better manager. I'm a harder worker. Does that matter? Wives, submit to your husbands.

As long as he's not asking you or demanding of you to sin, to violate God's word, Wives, submit to your husbands. Verse 24 tells us how, in what, in some things, in everything. Beloved, there's a side note that I have to make before we move on. A wife, your wife is a gift from God. A Godly wife is a gift from God.

She may be wiser than you. She may be more educated than you. She may be more responsible. She may be a lot of things. We would be absolute fools, absolute fools to take the blessing that God has placed in our household and not consider those things.

We'll be absolute fools to squash and to quench the giftings that the Lord has given our lives. Remember that she is there to sanctify us as we are her. God has placed her in the context of our family, not because she doesn't submit to us because we are smarter than her or that we are always wise and we always got the better option. We would be absolute fools to make decisions always based on our own understanding and never consult the wisdom and the grace of our lives. Wives, submit to your husbands.

You know that word submit is actually not in the original. Wives, submit to your husband. That word submit is not in the original here in verse 22. But it's obvious. The reason why the translators have placed it in there is because it's obviously meant to be there.

How come? Well, in the previous verse, verse 21, Paul's already given how that submission should play out with all our relationships. He'll begin with wives and husbands and then children and their parents, and then, of course, masters and slaves. But there in verse 21, he says, submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ. And then he says, wives to your husbands.

So it's obviously speaking about submission. Plus the parallel passage in Colossians 3.18 actually writes the word in the original. So there's no question that submission is, the concept of submission is in view here. There's absolutely no, there's no question.

And throughout the New Testament, we know, we know throughout the New Testament that the concept of submission, the wife's submission to her husband is throughout the New Testament. So clearly also in 1 Peter 3, right? In verse 5 where we're told specifically that is the case. But I say that because many have tried in our day, as I said, this is a controversial passage, many have tried to wrinkle out of this truth. Is there some way that we can make this sound or mean something else?

Because it's a difficult truth to swallow. Let's admit it. Our society doesn't say, doesn't see that the value and the self-worth of someone is not found in their role or their functional differences. They say that it's found in the position. If you have a position of leadership, then you're of more value in our society.

Which is a lie, we've already established that through the scripture. But beloved, the word here is a strong one. The word submit, that your Paul uses in verse 21, and also that we see in the Colossians and in Peter. The word submit is really, it has a military background. And it means to come under one's rank.

To come under one's rank. It literally means to subject yourself, your needs, your wants, your desires, to yield those things to another. Love, there is no question here what the Lord is saying. Wives, be submissive to your own husbands as unto the Lord. I don't think the Apostle's meaning here as unto the Lord is that wives should be submitting to the husbands in a worshipful way.

Of course, that's not the nuance that the Apostle Paul is trying to portray. But I do believe it is the same sense or spirit. I think in verse 24, he clears that up where he says, now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands. So let me ask you a question. How ought the church submit to Christ?

What ought to be the attitude of the church in her submission to the Lord Jesus Christ? Should it be begrudging or joyful? Should it be wholehearted or half-hearted? Should it be against their will, as though we've been coerced to do so? or should it be willingly, because we know that everything he does towards us is for our own good.

Beloved, you cannot do this. Sisters, you're not able to submit to your husband in this way, unless you have that conviction that this is the word of God. You won't be able to, unless you believe it is not only the word of God, but it is also for your own good. And it's this type of submission, is that a submission that only is relevant in matters of faith. Is that a possibility?

Is Paul saying here, submit to your husbands only in matters of faith, only when you open the Bible and there's a discussion, there might be a difference. Because we do know that the husband ought to be bringing the word of God to bear upon his wife, to wash her with the word. We know that. We know that in Timothy, that wives should be learning from their husband. That's your responsibility, husbands, and mine, to teach our wives through the word.

That's a great responsibility. But is that what the apostle Paul is saying? Submit to your husband's in, in everything. Not just the matters of faith, in everything. Of course, that doesn't mean in matters of sin, in matters where your husband's asking you to violate God's word or your conscience.

We're not saying that at all. But he does say in everything. And at this point, we can dig a bit deeper and look at the word submit. And we can give some practical examples of what that is in relation to that word, everything. But beloved, there's really no need, I don't think, because the passage is self-explanatory.

It means what he says, and it says what he means. And to be honest, the reason why I think there's much confusion about what that submission looks like in the context of a marriage is not because we lack understanding of the nuances of a biblical marriage. I don't think it's that, but I believe it's because of a lack of understanding, and I think more experientially, of what it means for the church to submit to Christ, because that's the picture that we've been given. That's the example that we're given, remember? You see, I believe we are not meant to bring up the practical scenarios to work through, to deepen our understanding of how that submission should work within the context of a marriage.

That could be helpful to some degree, but rather we should ought to meditate upon how the church ought to submit to Christ and from there derive principles of how the wife ought to submit to her husband. It's what we did last week, remember, by looking at how Christ manifested his great love for us in laying down his life for us as a sacrifice, as a propitiation, and then to flood us with the washing of his word, and he continues to do that until he returns. I think husbands, I think wives ought to look at the example of how the church submits to Christ. And from there, they can derive how that submission looks like. For starters, we're told in verse 23 that Christ is the what?

Head of the church. Remember the husband is a picture of Christ in the marriage and the wife is the picture of the church. Remember that? The head essentially speaks to what? to authority and to leadership.

It's the head who has the authority over the body. He's the one who gives instruction to the body and the body willingly obeys. Can you imagine a body that goes against the head? It'd be difficult to imagine, right? If you imagine something like that, it wouldn't be a pretty picture.

But beloved, the example that Jesus gives is that the body is so precious to him. You remember what he said in the verses 25 moving forward that he cherishes the body. that he nurtures the body. Is there a single need that the body of Christ is lacking? No.

He provides for her every single need. It's a tall order for a husband to live that way. I'll tell you that straight away. But the body submits and it follows and it obeys Christ. And the word obey, beloved, That's a word that strikes against the world today as well, right?

I mean, when you hear that wives obey your husbands, that sounds harsh sometimes, it sounds difficult, but that's the sense of this word submit, what it brings out. In fact, the word in 1 Peter 3, spoken of when he gives the example of how the wife is to submit to her husband, that word is literally obey. You remember the example we were given in 1 Peter 3? Sarah and Abraham. He says, Sarah obeyed Abraham.

Now I know there are elements of abuse in this. There's so many that we can bring up. And I didn't get a chance to speak to them last week and we are running out of time this week. And so we need to keep these things in mind. This is not an open blanket statement that I'm saying.

So we have to be careful in this. But beloved, we either take God's word for what it is or we shy away from it. I'm not going to be one to shy away from it. I do believe this is the word of God. And I believe that he's written, he's given us his word for the very best of his church and for the very best of his body.

And we know that Christ is the perfect example. He's the perfect example. And the church submits to Christ as the loving head, as the loving husband, he makes obedience. I know he makes obedience to him a joyful experience. Nothing better in our right minds is there than to submit and yield ourself to the one who loved us to the extent that he laid down his life for us.

Whenever the church disobeys Christ, it's always whose fault? The church's fault. Because she's still in this sinful world. There's still the flesh to battle with. There's still influences of temptation.

But Christ is the perfect husband and his love is absolutely perfect. to his bride. And sisters, I can say with absolute certainty that the difficulty here with comparing Christ and the church and you and your husband and speaking of submission is I can say with absolute certainty, sisters who are listening here and both online, that I can tell you your husbands fall short of that command. It's a tall order. They always will fall short of that command, but it ought to be what they desire.

It ought to be what they strive towards, Christ-likeness. That's the goal of every Christian male or female, Christ-likeness. This side of paternity, husbands are not going to reach that perfection, I'm afraid. So your husbands will always fall short of being the picture of Christ to their wives. Not an excuse, but a reality.

We pursue and we strive by God's grace. Wives, this is not new to you. These words, are not new to you. You know what I'm saying. You know what I'm speaking of.

Not because you're very good at identifying your husband's weaknesses, and some wives are better at that than others, but rather because you, if you have trusted in Jesus Christ, if you've been united in him, you have now experientially known what it is to have a perfect husband. Daily you're learning the joy of submitting, of yielding, of obeying, of following a husband who is actually worthy of your love. a husband who's actually worthy of your energies, a husband who is actually worthy of your complete surrender and your complete obedience. You know what it is to have a perfect husband in Christ Jesus. And therefore, from that standard, it doesn't take a genius to know that your husband's every one of them, me included 100% for short.

of that mark and we fall short desperately of that mark. And yet, nonetheless, wise, my sisters in the Lord, you are commanded to submit to this simple human being called your own husband as to the Lord. With the same joy, with the same love, with the same obedience, to submit to your fallen husbands and to follow his lead. Because by doing so, you're not submitting simply to him, you're submitting to Christ. Because that is what he has commanded.

Did you get what I'm saying? Let me be more simple. At the risk of offending every man in this room online and in the world, There is not even a single man, there's not a single husband in this room listening in the world, not a single husband, beloved, who is worthy in of himself of the total submission of his None. Not a single one. And beloved wives, you don't submit to your husbands because they are worthy in and of themselves of your submission.

You submit because Jesus is worthy. You submit because Jesus is worthy. Your submission doesn't have your husband in ultimate view, but Christ. Christ. You see how it makes sense now to see how our submission or the submission of the wife to a husband is in everything, not because he's worthy or he deserves it, but because Christ is worthy.

And beloved, this will free you. This truth will set you free. All our relationships, no matter with whom it is, must have in our eyes the focus foremost set upon Christ. and not the person. Lord, I will submit and follow my husband, verse 22.

Lord, I'll respect him, in verse 33. Lord, I'll love him, in Titus 2, 3. Lord, I will recognize his authority over me and listen, obey, and learn from him, 1 Timothy 2, 11. Lord, I will be faithful to him, or try to be faithful, that's faithful I possibly can, to him, 1 Timothy 3, 11, because you are worthy, and my goal and desire is to be faithful, obedient to my eternal, perfect husband, Jesus Christ. Submit to your husband as unto the Lord.

And that submission, the Apostle Paul has already painted what all submission should look like in the relationships that we have in this world. In verse 21, when he said, submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. You see that? Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. That means that everything you do, the focus is Jesus.

He's the one you want to please. He's the one you want to honor. He's the focal point of your very heart and your very existence last week. I said to the man, you cannot begin to be a faithful biblical husband unless your relationship with the Lord is healthy. Women, my sisters, wives, you cannot be faithful in your relationship with your husbands unless your relationship with Christ is healthy and your eyes are fixed upon him and him alone as the author and the perfecter of your faith.

The command to husbands to love their wives is not ultimately because in and of yourself, but because in and of himself is worthy. And beloved, I know that the study for husbands was last week, but wives, I can turn that on its head as well. And the reality in the opposite is true. Because husbands, the tall order that you and I have been given to follow the example of Christ is to lay down our lives for our brides, like Christ laid down his life for his church. That means self-abandonment.

That means your goals, your motives. That means, my apologies, your objectives. That means the things that you once thought of as an individual, you put those aside and now you lay down your life so that this individual, this blessed individual that the Lord has placed in your heart, your key goal. is to honor Christ by laying down your life for her and by bringing the Word of God to bear upon her. Beloved, let me ask you this question.

Is there a single wife on the planet that in and of herself is worthy of such? How do we answer that? Simply by saying, Christ laid down his life for she a wife that is worthy. Just like the husband is not worthy of his wife's submission. The wife is not worthy of her husband's complete love.

It is simply that Christ is worthy. And despite our weaknesses, our fallings, our failures, if we have eyes to look to Christ and my live, I live my life for Jesus Christ, because he's the one who is worthy. Then when I lay down my life, I do it for the sake of Jesus. And when I submit to my husband, I do it for the sake of Jesus. Beloved, can you see how blessed a biblical marriage is?

It blows my mind. absolutely blows my mind how glorious a blessing God has ordained in the context of a biblical marriage of husband and wife who will truly seek to be obedient to the word of God. That means husbands, thanks be to God if you have been married to a godly wife, because in Christ, she's treating you 100 times better than you deserve. Wives. Thank God if you're married to a biblical husband, because he too is commanded to love you so much more than you deserve.

The blessedness of a Christian marriage is this, that both the husband and the wife render the love and the respect and the faithfulness to one another that only Christ deserves. And yet, and yet we become the recipients of that blessedness. In other words, how can you have it better than to be treated like the Lord Jesus Christ? And that's what he says in the context of a marriage. Husbands, love your wives like Christ loved the church.

Wives, submit to your husbands as the church submits to Christ. We can go further and ask the question, doesn't all this change? Husbands, wives can ask that question. Doesn't it all change if I'm married to someone who's not in the Lord, or if someone's not obeying the Lord, or if my husband is not clearly following after Christ? As I said earlier, sinful behavior should never be obeyed.

It should never be submitted to. That's the precedent. Your relationship with your eternal husband, Jesus Christ, takes precedence over all things. Husband that requires his wife to do anything sinful, is something the wife does not need to submit to obey or follow in their footsteps at all. But there are times that as wives we need to distinguish between preferences and sin.

Because there are times where this submissiveness, this submitting to your husband's word, who is a fallen human being, there are times that you need to put your preferences aside. It may be in the context of a biblical marriage, there ought to be discussion, there ought to be prayer, there ought to be the Word of God to come into the situation, and there ought to be a loving deliberation between the husband and wife and trust through prayer that the Lord would unite the hearts. But we know that that's not always the case. There are times where through a decision needs to be made. And at the end of the day, there is two different opinions.

And beloved, if either or neither one of these is sin, the Bible says so clearly, set aside your preferences. And at that point, submit to your husbands, you may think that you're right. But he says at that point, submit to your husbands and trust the consequences in the Lord's hands. This is when we trust the Lord. Do we believe that he has written his word for our own good?

And our question, if our answer is yes, absolutely. In that point, submit to your husbands because this is fitting in the eyes of the Lord and then trust him with the consequences and husbands, you will give an account for that decision you've made. You will give an account before the Lord for all decisions you've made. If you made it as a tyrant, if you made it because you're a pride, if you made it out of selfish ambition, you will give an account. And wives, your husbands will give an account, and so will you.

The way we treat one another in the context of a biblical marriage ought not to be because of the actions of the other, but rather because of our obedience to Jesus Christ. So does the role, let me ask that question again, so does the role, the role of submission, the headship change from wife to husband, wife to husband, when the husband is not walking with the Lord or when the husband is not manifesting the Christian virtues. Let's say the husband is lazy. Let's say he's irresponsible. Let's say he doesn't lead like he should.

Should those roles be changed? Should the wife take headship? Beloved, No, the Bible is absolutely clear. A wife should never be the head. She should never assume the head of that marriage ever.

You see, the Lord has spoken. He's spoken in creation. That's how, that's the function and the role and the responsibilities he's given in his creative order. And that never ever changed. It is unchangeable.

The Bible is clear that submission is even necessary. to an unbelieving husband. I'm gonna explain that a little bit later, but the submission is even necessary to an unbelieving husband. 1 Peter 3 is very clear on that. I was gonna expand it, but I'm not going to for the sake of time.

I can see the time has escaped us, and I'm gonna bring this to a close, but I will read the text to you because I think this text needs to be read on a time that we're speaking about the wives in the context of marriage. 1 Peter 3, let me start reading for you from verse one. You don't have to open there. Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands so that even if some do not obey the word, did you hear that? Even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives when they see your respectful and pure conduct.

Here's someone who's not obeying the word. Does your conduct change? Wives, sisters, does your conduct change because your husband is not obeying the word? No, your role is still the same and you trust the Lord. And then he goes on to say, do not let your adorning be external, the braiding of hair and putting on the gold jewelry or clothing you wear, but let your adorning be hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is in God's sight, very precious.

For this is how the holy women who hoped in God used to adorn themselves by submitting to their own husbands. As Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him Lord, and you are her children if you do good and do not fear anything that is frightening. My husband has dropped the ball. That's no excuse to assume headship. Your conduct is before the Lord.

and for the Lord, irrespective of how weak, irresponsible your husband is. Now to be clear, there may be holes that the wife needs to fill in the context of marriage if there's neglect of the children. if there's difficulties, if there's certain things that must be upheld that should be the responsibility. I'm not saying that the wife, the loving biblical wife, is not to take those responsibilities on board to make sure that there's a functioning of the family when the husband drops the ball and drops his responsibility. Absolutely she ought But in her heart, she's always to know that this is unnatural for her.

In her heart, she should always pray to God that the Lord will give her husband or inspire her husband to open his eyes, that he would assume his calling and lead the family. and actually honor Christ and lay down his life for his wife and his children. That her heart and her prayer also should always be that my husband is and does take on that responsibility for what he is. I'm not the head, and I never will be. I'm doing these things because he's let go.

I'm doing these things because he's been irresponsible and the family needs to continue. but in the heart always praying and appealing to God, saying, Lord, please bring the normal order to this household that you would be honoured. And all the while still submitting, all the while still respecting the husband, because remember, not because he is worthy, but Christ is worthy. And beloved, that may be the grace of God at work. And you probably know what I'm going to say every time.

We've been in situations where we prayed for the sanctification of the Lord. I hope we do that daily, weekly. But how many times have we prayed that the Lord would give us patience? How many times have we prayed that the Lord will give us resilience, that he will give us gentleness, that he'll give us self-control? How many times have we looked to Jesus and said, I'm so far off the mark, Lord, make me more like you.

How many times have we prayed for these things? And you know as well as I do, when God answers our prayer, he doesn't put an injection, a serum that just gives us more of these virtues. We know that's not the case. He allows us to go into difficulty. He allows us to go into times of testing, in times of trials, in order to manifest those things, in order to produce in us a greater Christ-likeness.

So beloved brothers and sisters, it may just be It may just be that the difficulties you experience, the things that might rub you the wrong way in that relationship between yourself and your wife, and you know individually what I'm talking about, it may just be that the Lord has allowed for that in his divine wisdom, in his absolute sovereignty, so that he will work that in you towards Christlikeness. The Lord gives me patience. He puts you in situations where patience is almost unbearable, and He produces in you patience. The Lord helped me to love. He doesn't put people who are so lovable before you, but people who are hard to love.

Give me forbearance. Give me gentleness. Lord, when you ask the Lord, he knows what you need. He is producing in you. That is his promise, to produce in you a Christ-likeness.

Husbands, the same, and wives, the same. When your husbands are not carrying the ball as you think they should, how you act in that moment, how you act in that relationship is telling of how your relationship is with the Lord. and how you love the Lord, irrespective of how your husband is treating you. And we pray that among us, there's only biblical loving families being fostered. We are sinful people, but we hope and pray that we all submit to God's word.

But irrespective of how the husband is and what his lack of virtues are, Your attitude ought to always be the same, and that is, Lord, help me to be a godly wife. Help me to submit to him in everything as unto the Lord. Because my eyes are fixed on you. I know this is your word. I know that you have spoken and you've revealed your word.

And I know everything you have revealed in your word is for my own good. And even in this difficulty, you are producing in me a sanctification. You're producing in me a Christ-likeness that cannot be produced any other way. Lord, help me. Help me.

to look to you and to honour you and submit to my husband, even though he may not be worthy of that submission. The example you've been given, and I'm not gonna elaborate on this, I'm sorry we have gone way over, but just give me one minute and I'll end. I love the fact that in everything, we've always been given an example in Jesus Christ. The husband's been given such a clear example of how to lay down his life, how to love his bride, because the love of Christ is evident in the propitiation, in him dying on the cross for our sins. And wives, you've also been given an example in Christ.

Any which way you look at it, our eyes ought to be always on Christ. And the example is this, that in the incarnation, Christ himself submitted completely and wholly to the will of the Father. Now, given the father is perfect and worthy of love and submission, I take it. But Jesus submitted to that which was excruciating. You remember in Gethsemane, sweating like drops of blood, his prayer, Lord, take away this cup from me, but not as I will, but that your will be done.

Oh, the anguish of the cross. But Lord, only your will will I do. Your will is my food, he says. That's the example he's given us, that we lay down our own goals and motives. It is for the husband as it is for the wife to submit to her husband because that is fitting and right in the eyes of God.

And in all this, when the husband acts like a biblical husband and the wife acts like a biblical wife, in the context of a biblical marriage, the world will see the beauty of the church. The world will see the beauty of the relationship of the church with Christ and that wonderful human that is so beautifully pictured in the relationship, a loving relationship of a husband and a wife in the context of a biblical marriage. A lot more we could say, but we'll end there. Let's practice.